4 steps to make sure the transition back to school goes well

Donatella Fitzgerald MBE
Donatella Fitzgerald MBE
Two school girls getting onto. a schoolbus

As we start thinking about returning to school, the big question for teachers and parents is: How can we help our children get off to a smooth start?

After the long break, students might be keen to see their friends again. But it's not always easy to get back into the class routine. It's especially difficult when students are moving into a newclass orare facing important exams.

So what can you do to support children in transitioning back to school at the beginning of the academic year?

Here are 4 steps to help them get off to a great start.

1. Be organized and create routines

Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it's not all mixed up. – A. A. Milne

Have a "family meeting" to brainstorm the routines for the school year,e.g., tidying room, getting school clothes/uniform/bag ready the evening before, homework routines, familymeal times and exercise. Ensure each member of the family has input into the routine too. Create a chart with the routines so everyone can see what has been agreed upon and how they are being adhered to.

2. Start bedtime routines early

Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise. – Benjamin Franklin

Agreeing on firm bedtimes during the school week is very important for everyone in the family.

If children and teenagers do not get enough sleep, it can negatively impact their healthand academic achievement. It's important that they are aware of this too.

In an ideal world, we should ensure that adults and children are not exposed to any form of screen time for at least 30 minutes to one hour before bedtime. This will help everyone sleep better.

Start the back-to-school sleep transition gradually. To help your child adjust, move bedtime up by 30 to 60 minutes at a time over the course of a few days or a week before the start of school so the transition from a later bedtime to an earlier one is progressive.

3. Talk about homework and teach organizational skills

When it's obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don't adjust the goals, adjust the action steps. – Confucius

Organization needs to be taught and practiced. As children get older, homework usually increases. Take an active interest in your child's homework.

Parents can be supportive by demonstrating organizational skills and helping children with time management. Assist them with creating a plan for their homework and encourage your child (whatever age) to have a study plan of some sort and to set goals for their homework which are SMART:

  • Specific – Describe in detail what activities they are going to do.
  • Measurable – How will they know when they are progressing/finished?
  • Achievable – Do they have the skills and resources to get to their goal?
  • Relevant – How does this goal connect to short and long-term targets?
  • Time-bound – Set a concrete deadline.

Teach them how to approach homework with a "strategy". How much homework do they have? How long will it take to do it? Prioritize urgent homework and do more difficult things when they are less tired.

Make sure there's adequate space in your house and set up a homework-friendly area that is welllit, andhas a table with enough room to put their pens and books. Of course, this is preferably somewhere quiet.

Also, it's important that parents are motivators and monitors and that they try to make themselves available for advice. Always praise children for their work and efforts. If you spot any problems, try and address them. Keep distractions to a minimum at home while they are doing their homework.

4. Make mealtimes quality family time: listen and share one good thing about each day

Kids who grow up having family dinners, when they're on their own, tend to eat more healthily. – Anne Fishel 

A meal around the table can bring to the entire family and be an important opportunity for daily interaction. Sitting down to eat as a family provides the opportunity to have an influence over both short and long-term familyhealth, andcan help children establish resilience and the ability to cope with the demands of life as we know it now and in the future. It can also be an opportunity to introduce mindful eating too – being more aware of what and how we are eating.

Additionally, this time together allows for members to talk and share things about their day and also offers an opportunity to establish a strong and powerful bonding experience. How can we make sure family mealtimes are quality time?

  • Be attentive and offer undivided attention during this time.
  • Turn all modern technology off during the meal so everyone is focused on each other.
  • Talk to each other about topics such as: What lessons do you have today (at breakfast)? What did you enjoy about today? What did you have for lunch (while sharing the evening meal). Tell me one thing you learned today. What made you laugh today? What made you happy today?
  • Listen mindfully to your child's thoughts and worries (if any).
  • Encourage each member to talk about one good thing that has happened to them that day. This lets them know you are there for them.
  • Assign mealtime jobs to involve everyone, e.g.: setting and clearing the table and putting away the dishes.

However, sometimes it's not possible to share meal times during the week so plan at least one on the weekend if possible.

The benefits of any small moment of time can have long-lasting positive influences on your child's mental and physical health. Children model adultbehaviorand if they see you eating and engaging positively with them and others, they will carry this into their own lives.

With a bit of preparation, the leadup and transition back to school can be smooth and enjoyable not only for children but also for the rest of the family.

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    For primary and elementary school children (Ages 5–11)

    1. Set a consistent sleep and waking schedule and stick to it

    • Action:At least one week before school starts, set a firm wake-up and bedtime, including a shut-off time for screens – ideally an hour before bedtime.Find soothing activities to help your child relax before bed: for example, if their bedtime is 8:00 pm, you could start the wind-down routine at 7:00 pm by reading a favourite story together and listening to peaceful music. Some children wake naturally, others struggle to get up and may need an alarm clock to help them.
    • Enforcement:Remember to stick to the bedtime routine: no exceptions on school nights.

    2. Practice the morning routine

    • Action: Do a rehearsal of the school morning: getting dressed, eating breakfast, brushing teeth, and being ready to leave the house on time. If your child is attending a new school, it may reassure them to rehearse the journey in advance.
    • Enforcement: Use a visual checklist on the fridge to help your child track which tasks need to be done. Some families prefer no screens at all in the morning, but if you have morning screentime then ensure there's no TV or devices until all tasks are complete.

    3. Organize school supplies together

    • Action: Label all supplies in advance. Take the time every evening to pack their schoolbag together each evening.
    • Enforcement:Let your child be responsible for checking off a packing list before bed. If they forget something, if appropriate and within reason, you could let them experience the natural consequence.

    4. Establish a homework zone

    • Action: Set up a specific, distraction-free spot for homework.
    • Enforcement:Ensure that homework happens before playtime or screen time. Use a timer if needed to keep them focused: most children find it easier to concentrate for a finite period rather than an infinite one (for example, "work until the timer goes off in 15 minutes" is easier for a child to respond to than "work until you've completely finished your homework").

    5. Practice independence

    • Action: Teach your child tasks that are appropriate for their age and ability: for example, this could include tieing their shoelaces, zipping up their coat and opening their lunchbox.
    • Enforcement:Don't rush to help if they struggle at first. Remind them of the steps, help them if they need, support them all the way. Praise their effort, even if they can't yet do the task perfectly.

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    • Action: Post a large calendar in a common area. Mark it with assignment due dates, tests and extracurricular activities.
    • Enforcement: Review the calendar together every Sunday. Give your child the resopnsibility of updating it with new info from school.

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    • Enforcement:If need be, use parental controls or apps to limit screen time. Devices could also be handed in at a set time each night.

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    • Action: If your child has a problem at school, support them in resolving it. Don't rush to solve the problem for them, ask them how they could approach the issue and guide them towards a good solution. If need be, coach them on how to email a teacher or ask for help in person.
    • Enforcement: Don’t step in immediately – give them the space and support to devise a possible solution. Support and coach as needed to build their confidence in handling the situation themselves.

    4. Make packing lunch their job

    • Action: Teach your child to pack their own lunch the night before.
    • Enforcement: If they forget to prepare or bring it, choose the response that's safe and appropriate for your chld's age and abilities. It might be that you need to remind them, or it might be that they need to experience natural consequences and buy their own lunch.

    5. Set clear after-school expectations

    • Action: Decide together what happens after school: for example, they might want to have a snack before they start their homework, and they might want to do their chores after dinner.
    • Enforcement:Together, set the rules that are right for your child. For example, no video games or social media until homework and chores are done.

    For high-school students (ages 14–18)

    1. Require a weekly planning session

    • Action: Sit down every Sunday to review the week ahead. Consider deadlines, activities and work shifts and plan accordingly.
    • Enforcement: If your teen misses a deadline, if appropriate, let them handle the consequences with teachers or coaches.

    2. Enforce a “No-phone zone” during study time

    • Action:Ensure that phones are placed in another room during homework.
    • Enforcement: Use apps that block distracting sites or physically remove the phone.

    3. Set a reasonable curfew, even for seniors

    • Action: Agree on a curfew for school nights and weekends.
    • Enforcement:If the curfew is broken, discuss consequences and follow through. For example, if your teen is one hour late home, the next time they must come home an hour early.

    4. Expect participation in household responsibilities

    • Action:Discuss how to split household chores. Some teenagers prefer to take responsibility for a particular chore, such as doing the dishes. Other families may need to split regular chores such as laundry,cleaning and emptying the bin.
    • Enforcement: No privileges such as car keys and allowance until chores are done.

    5. Monitor academic progress, but don’t micromanage

    • Action: Check grades and other school feedback together regularly. Ask about upcoming tests and projects.
    • Enforcement: If their grades slip, find out if there's an underlying reason and offer support. Your child may require a study plan or a limit on their extracurricular activities until improvement is shown.

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    • Consistent mealtimes: Eat a meal together regularly, if your schedules allow. Some families meet for breakfast, others for dinner. Make sure your child is not skipping meals, especially on school days.
    • Limit extracurricular overload: One or two activities per term is plenty. Be sure to protect their downtime.
    • Model organization: Use lists, calendars and reminder apps and show your chldren how they help you stay organized.
    • Open communication: Have a daily check-in if possible. Ask about the best and most challenging parts of their day.

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